DIE

Whoops! I forgot the T in my title. But thats pretty much how it feels anyways. UGH! I hate Dieting. H.A.T.E! I tend to put myself on 3 diets per year for about a month length of time each time to maintain my weight. So I spend 1/4 of my year dieting. FML! Now this is not the most efficient way of maintaining a weight. Why don't I just eat healthy all the time? HAH!!! Truth is, I really am not that unhealthy of an eater.My metabolism is as good as an infant child is at vocabulary. The following are diets I have tried.

*The South Beach

*Atkins

*HCG (aka hot call girl)

*Dukan (aka Dukan't)

*The GM Diet

I would actually say diets are not that hard for me. Once I decide to do it, I just eat what I can (other than wine and cocktails, because I am not going to forfeit everything LOL)  I think the biggest misconception with dieting is cheating on your diet. Sometimes agitation takes over and it would be better for you to "cheat" than it would be to not. Its your sanity. BUT here is where it backfires. Once you cheat, you cheat all day because "YOU ALREADY CHEATED" so instead of having ate one thing that is bad. You end up eating 89374 things that are bad and feel way worse about yourself LOL! Dieting also sucks because depending on what "diet" you are on cheating affects you differently because you are on different food restrictions. For Example the diet I started today (Dukan) is a high protein diet. So eating fruit is totally cheating, and fruit isn't bad for you. So I eat an apple- thats just as bad on this diet as eating chocolate. You are not suppose to go there. To prepare myself for this diet last night, I consumed an entire bag of fresh cherries. Seriously. I ate the whole bag!

Now what are the reasons for going on a diet?

The new year (hahahaha) because your favorite pants don't fit right, because of an event coming up that you want to look hot for, because you are gluten for punishment.  Ok, The following 3 are applying to me right now. My pants dont fit and I would like to buy some shorts. Seeing as how I dont own any. I always wear dresses and skirts. esp in the summer! But I hate that my pants don't fit and my lovely husband just dried my skinny jeans in the dryer. OMG!!! Now they shrunk and make me look anything but skinny. Event is this: Family pictures. As if thats not explanatory enough: The last and most recent family picture was when I was a JR in HIGH SCHOOL. Yep thats right, no family pics with my parents/x husband/ or my son are around. Im getting pictures for my Mom for her Bday in Nov that will most likely be taken in Sept Which gives me about 6 weeks to slim down for this shot. If this trend continues the next family picture that will be taken will be when I am 45!!!!! I MUST ROCK THIS ONE!!!  And yes, I enjoy punishing myself. Not really, But I do like the results.

I also have thought this before. That I wish I would get so super sick that I would basically die. then when I didn't i'd be skinny. How awful to think. But Im sick of my weight being something constantly on my mind. People joke "Meth. Best diet ever" "Chemo, Best diet ever" "Parasite. Best diet ever" "Dukan. Best diet ever." Ok said no one ever, about the Dukan. But........

Here is to diet dos. (2nd one of the year) CHEERS!!!!!