My husband has enabled her for a lot of years. She is the woman that always gets what she wants. And if something is of a slight discomfort to her she will not do it. Meaning....Jobs, paying for things for Zoey, driving Zoey to her Dad, Insuring Zoey, Paying for Zoeys lunch money, Paying for her summer camp, finding a babysitter when she didn't pay for summer camp, meeting Joel HALFWAY to trade off Zoey, paying Dr Co pays for Zoey, Paying Dr Bills for Zoey. OK basically anything that has to do with her DAUGHTER is Joels responsibility. Now that that's clear. She is overly obsessed with Zoey. She has now written me 2 separate emails 2 whole years apart bitching me out for not "caring" about Zoey. THE NERVE RIGHT????? After everything she WON'T do for ZOEY she bitches at me for that? I have babysat last minute, picked her up from Layton and other places random when she cannot. Paid for Summer camp for her, I have bought her clothes, I insure her at my job, And Joel pays her nearly half a paycheck a month to her and is being garnished for unpaid medical bills because she filed bankruptcy. We also pay for recreational activities when the kids are with us, plus buy her anything she needs while at our house. I have tried to hold Zoey to a standard of discipline and apparently those things mean I do not care. She has made it very difficult for me to Parent Zoey because she told Zoey she doesn't do anything wrong. and lets her do whatever she wants. And boy, does she....shes 9 now but I don't see her following rules at 15 if they were never set for her as a child. That is a whole other blog about blending families and problems that I never knew existed causing severe contention. But back to this...... She doesn't want me around her daughter because I am a bad influence!!!!
OK moving on from that, She has also gone as far as to insult Zach in these emails that he is a brat & so on. Um, Zach is a 7 year old BOY. He is not a Brat. He's very smart and sweet. Protective of me. But he is a boy. I'm sorry if he hurt his sisters feelings. Give me a break. Brothers and Sisters do that. And how did he hurt her feelings? He told her he didn't want to go to her Craft Birthday Party. Yes, That is why he is a Brat. Because she was crying. Pretty sure she wouldn't want to go to a Tag Football Party either. She also went as far as to say that anyone who associates with me is a bad person. OMG. I have had it up to HERE with this woman. I shouldn't have defend Zach for anything in this instance. He is a good kid. No, not perfect. Unlike her I don't see my child as perfect.
I sent her my two cents and we haven't spoken since but I wanted to take the kids swimming last week and asked Joel if she would meet me halfway so I can take them. (obviously it would make more sense if I can ask her directly....but....) She wouldn't even meet me. Her panties are that far up her ass that she doesn't even have the civility to meet me in a parking lot so Zoey can get out of the car and come swimming with us? SERIOUSLY! Girl, needs to get over herself. Ya I am irritated at her but nothing else new about that. I am pretty used to her shenanigans Ive been with Joel for 3 1/2years. Usually, I've found that people mature over the years but she is the true exception to this. I want to be civil for Zoeys sake but she makes it so Damn hard. I couldn't go to Zoeys Choir performance a few weeks ago because I think she owes me an apology and I don't know how to act. Its awkward to go and not speak to her while sitting right by her and I'm not about to act like nothing happened, because she has overstepped the line multiple times and by me acting like nothing happened is saying its OK and its NOT.
Now I know how to do this whole Step parent to my kid thing. Zachs step mom has been around for 5+ years now and although we've had some problems too, Ive never, nor would I ever, bitch at her. I have spoken with Zachs Dad a few times about her over stepping her bounds and hurting my feelings and what not so I would never cross those lines with Zoey. But Zach's step mother and I get along. I actually consider her a friend. We have taken the kids to do Pictures together so Victoria and Ben can be in the photo with Zach also. And I've also gone swimming with her and her kids and Zach & Zoey. Ive also Babysat her kids for her. I am a strong believer that this is how it should be. Its complete peace and harmony with both families for Zachary. THIS is how I would have wanted it for him. Its about HIM. Its not about ME or about his DAD. I really wish Zoey's mother would realize this and put herself aside for ONCE IN HER LIFE and stop being so selfish because she thinks she's doing whats "best" for her daughter and she's actually doing whats "worst" for her.
I respect that Zachs step mom isn't his Mom but that she does a lot for him. I would never tell her not to discipline Zach even if I didn't agree with the punishment. Its not my house and that's one of the things I've had to get over personally. I would hope Zoeys mother can come to same grounds with me because I deserve that respect from her and its difficult to expect respect from Zoey when her mother, an adult, refuses to show me that. I am going to be around for a long time, and its very comical that its this way after almost 4 years. and with that........ this made me laugh.
Cheers to next 4 years!
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